Regarding timeless truths, a woman’s social currency is her beauty, youth, sensuality, attitude, behaviour and charm, whilst a man’s social currency is his profession and financial status, nothing more, nothing less. Therefore, this truth has allowed men to look at women as sex objects and women look at men as success objects. This is to say that men like women who freely give in bed, at the same time women like men who are generous with money. A man daydream’s about a lady who will rock his entire world on a bedsheet, whereas a woman fantasizes about a gentleman who will turn her world around at Hermes, Tiffany’s, and Mercedes, with expensive trips abroad. However, both genders are looking for love as they say, but love for him is expressed through “good sex” and in her case nothing says “I love you” more than in financial security.

If this is the case, which I know is the painful truth in this century, why then do women complain about men always wanting sex and men lay complaint that all a woman want is money or that she spends too much. Stereotyping sex for love and money for deceitfulness have long gone in the 21st century. Even though romantics tend to think love is expected to be a situation of character and soul instead of material gains and sexual relations, it is expected to be an exchange, a Trade by Barter and those who do not trade well are seen as foolish. I think that there is nothing wrong with any of these exchanges, either Love, Money, Marriage, Babies, or whatever the case might be, as long as both parties agree on the terms and conditions, and each acquires what they want from the reciprocity.

We have been told countless times about the health benefits of having sex by numerous reports, which refer to the term “sexually active people” and the advantages of being one. In such reports, sexually active people are said to be more likely to have better memory, physical appearance or be emotional stable, but they really never speak about the drawbacks affiliated to people who are doomed with constant “regular sex” or “bad sex” and the conditions which play a huge role in its involvement. Sex in recent times have become a thing without regard, with such names given to it as hook-ups, one-night stands, fun, quickie, flings, you name it. People engage in this practise like having a three square meal. Now, the choice of meal, whether a three course, main course or a burger at a nearby food stand, is what powers an appetite, a seeming description of sexual intercourse desires.

“I give you attention, affection, time and companionship, you give me the same, or, I will offer you sex, emotional support, babies and a warm, nurturing place to come home to, while you provide the money, security and protection.”

Nowadays individuals have sex for different alarming reasons that are mostly related to money, as opposed to the main or preferred religious ideology. Lovemaking is now mainly perceived as some kind of job or responsibility in relationships or marriages. The willingness to engaged in the act without it being tied to either money-making or a type of domestic entitlement is gradually dying. Also, the pleasure that is expected to be bounded to sex is either there for a very short period or not there at all. The feeling of a happy satisfaction after mating is going out of fashion. It has however been replaced with the monetary benefits which comes before or after copulating. Due to the satisfaction which money brings, men and women do not bother to elevate the game of bedmatics or romance during an intercourse, as lovemaking is not supposed to start at night in the bedroom, it actually should end there. Anyway, for those who still practise genuine lovemaking without any financial attachment are a people who should be envied, especially if there is already money in the bank. These are the persons who benefits health-wise, from the satisfaction sex brings. The idea of sleeping with someone who you truly love is better than the feel of money, although before disappointments and other criteria which could make the relationship stressful or doubtful.

“I do what you ask me to do, you give me a pay cheque.”

Back to the issue of sex and money, rich, powerful men can have all the young, pretty women they want, as long as they can provide elite status and financial security for their women, who in turn provides beauty, elegance and sexual pleasures to their men. However, this idea has left many people with poor sexual relations, a shame which they hide from their lovers and close friends. A discussion which is gradually phasing out since most intimate physical contacts are not for genuine reasons. When was the last time girlfriends engaged in a conversations such as “How was he in bed?” or “Was he a good sport?”. Most of the time, it becomes enjoyable at the moment and not an activity that is remembered after the experience. While sometimes, it becomes a regrettable ordeal especially when it does not meet the expected goal, when surprises spring up during the act or when the gifts tied to these meetings are not met. Hence, these coincidence has increased the rate of “bad-sex” as experienced by partakers. Some people tend to painfully regret the whole process and sincerely wished they had not gotten themselves involved in it in the first place when requirements are not met, especially professional or important monetary demands. On the other hand, “good sex” is no longer categorised manly by performance or satisfaction, but the ability to “grease the palms” of the fellow participant with financial gains and the extent of the limits she is willing to offer in bed. Money and sexual endurance fuels the ability to produce a more sensual feeling during an intercourse, which makes sex more pleasurable and also allows room for a happier contributor. Money as they say is a natural lubricant to arouse female sexual organs and sexual acceptance summon’s an erected manhood, which prospers desirable sexual relationships and eliminates future sadness.

The most likely reason for distastefulness and failed relationships is the inability to produce the benefits that sexual intercourse is expected to bring, which in many cases is experienced by female participators. However, sexual entitlements might not be an obvious case in many countries, but it is a very clear and steady occurrence in countries were women are mostly segregated, inferior and oppressed. Countries where people do not directly benefit from the government or financial institutions, but mainly rely on themselves or immediate families for support, as power is still the ultimate aphrodisiac and money is the most potent form of power. The difficulties in acquiring loans and government benefits such as free proper health care, cash entitlements and cheap housing has made “ordinary men” more powerful when requesting for sexual pleasures, since women are boxed into using sex as a means of livelihood. Due to the difficulties and motivation to prosper, sex is now an obvious business agreement between two people, a money based relationship which mainly brings happiness into a relationship and marriage. As a consequence, loosing its essence as something expected to be between lovers or when the feelings are appropriate or mutual.

For clarification, “sex for money” has been in existence since time itself, but there are rules and regulations guiding such practises. There are business ventures built for such purpose, with workers and customers who are well knowledgable on why they are there. Both parties have negotiated and are fully aware of what is involved, instead of the use of deception, propaganda and threats that initiates a monetary-led sexual intercourse for those, mostly men who are not financially stable. The “sex for money” business is a very different scenario from when limitations and barriers are the primary reasons for engagement. We see or hear one such type of cases in work places, educational institutions and amongst family members. Instances were force or the use of authority is used to acquire sex at the detriment of the other person in question. A stolen acquisition influenced by criminal tendencies or mental diseases, one that is not tackled enough by government bodies responsible for such cases.

Welcome to the 21st Century Mating Game, don’t be a guest.

X pj.