I am just trying to feel better. Lately, it seems we are practically preparing for the worse. The ever rolling bad news is not for the faint of hearts. While others yet rejoice, many are in pain. Questions are being asked as tears flow as though taps were left opened in many homes. The flood is rising and many are sinking. Will the water sink many broken hearts or will strength yet again surface in such an avalanche of pain and misery, or should I drink a lot of water?
I have not witnessed any mishaps too close to home but I have been torn by the many disturbing news I have heard of late. The bad news seems to be pouring like a never-ending watery beans porridge from an old rusty pot in boarding house. I have lost a woman I admire so much; a true definition of a role model and an angel on earth, her name was Mrs Ibidunni Ituah-Ighodalo. I couldn’t hold my tears when I learnt of her demise while hanging out with friends that night. Aside from the many tears I have cried recently for victims, young and old, yours was a dagger straight to the chest; I cried differently. I have never met you in person, but my heart knows you very well. A long time ago my heart felt the strength of your love for others, particularly those who are wanting, so I watched you closely and wished for your kind of heart.
I have refused to look at myself at this point. I have become transparent. For in another point of my life’s journey, none of the ugly things I have been through in life mattered. Many are worse off, hence I am not going to carry these afflictions any longer. I have abandoned yet another bunch by the roadside because of Ibidun. I have chosen the peace and love that enveloped her while she was here with us! She was a SOLDIER OF LOVE, one I plan on emulating.
I will feel better again. Although, beauty is all I see when there is pain, but I am still in pain. I strongly believe nothing as a coincident. Everything that occurs, especially unfortunate events, is of value. I will take this value and forge a better feeling of gratitude that can only result to a better and happier life.
Pain can inspire you to become stronger, happier and more in love with life. Therefore, if you are reading this please do not give up. Hang on to the hope of a better tomorrow. There is so much more goodness, kindness and love in the world than darkness. Do not let the harsh situations dim your light, you CAN feel better again no matter what you have been through.
Rest in Peace Ibidunni.
We will miss you beauty queen!
X pj.
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